Relationship Survival. - Unpopular Thoughts

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Sunday, October 18, 2015

Relationship Survival.

I was walking in the garden late evening, and I saw that woman. The way she sat seemed attractive to me and I looked at her curiously.  I pretended to walk nearby; she hugged her knees and kept her head hidden between her arms. I sat a little away, and I could analyze something was severely wrong with her.
Gradually after a consistent meeting for almost a week, she responded to my smiles. Well ...finally, we interacted.
She spoke honest but I have to respect her privacy as well as have to convey lessons here.  I hope I need not to mention that it was about relationship failures as maximum people suffer a heartbreak but do not know many times – WHY?
Well, an entire book will be needed to write answeres to questions, if I start mentioning. Everyone shares different story. However, I think there are few repetitive reasons which dominated the most common causes of break-ups.
First , as always I point out, before knowing others, I think you should know yourself first. I know no matter how much cool you pretend to be but at some point of time for maximum people they get tired of being what they are not. Let it be a guy or girl, you both need to be honest with yourself  that what are you doing and why? This is essential where everyone should work so that at least they  do NOT contribute in making someone’s life miserable as well as theirs.
Well, when a relationship starts and for a few days in the beginning life seems charming due to the fulfillment of a wish.  Let this wish be with the feeling of love or infatuation or just a wish.
To win that heart which attracted you like your aim or ultimate goal, you do anything.
Please don’t be that dishonest with anyone as well as with yourself. You really have no idea that you are going to be away from peace and when you have mess in your head … You start spreading it around. So, If you are going to start an honest  peaceful relationship please work on these areas. If you think, it’s a fun to win and leave, sorry I don’t consider them in the category of human itself.
Most of the times, I say the rate of failures crosses the limit when you pretend to be in front of some other person  what you are really not.  In long run it will harm you both.  
If you are married, or already committed please understand the intensity and expectations you create due to your daydreaming.  Married ones I think they perform certain promises to build a foundation of togetherness, and every passing day they have to be adaptable and grow but should not forget the basic foundation of togetherness.
Sometimes two good people do not go along,  It is just because they are not self aware and neither with the need of other human being. If your relationship is strained, you both shall work on areas together, ok I have been doing this thing wrong, or think about the injury you do to others, as well as practice forgiveness. It keeps the heart light and let the burden go.
Be reasonable in relationships, do not just leave other and disappear. You know you have been together for a while or for long. However, be fair and give other person all honest reasons of split if you want to split.
Do not forget old promises and keep on making new ones. I literally have been observing a lot about it. There are some people who make promises,- let me take example of a married couple. They appeared to be like love bird. Both felt peace with each other. One day the guy falls sick and for welfare of the girl he goes away without speaking much things and all things he said were harsh so that the girl starts hating him and after his death get married to other man. Heroic Action! Isn’t it.
When you get married , there is  a promise that being together in sickness and pain. I do not know on what assumptions people make such promises because when the time comes, there is no ‘them’ and as I say there is only a stand alone condition remains.
Knowingly or unknowingly the hurt given to others in the name of welfare, I bet it never works. The kindness is the only thing which impacts on souls the most.
In another example, some people married or committed, they promise never to leave. Yes everyone knows how it goes emotionally between partners. Is it an honest statement you say? What is after all of sudden of cuddling, he / she remembers oh my gosh! What have I done? I promised my father not to fall in love and I can not hurt my father.
I can write a lot about it, but I hope this is enough. And if you have been cheated or left alone, please do not waste your life. Attach it to a purpose not to the one who left you betrayed, or for her/ his reasons.
If you want to love still, go ahead but do not be unjustified with yourself. No one can stand for you until you stand yourself. And believe me, the one who brings tears and leaves you at the point of no where, is not worth of a thought.
If your relationship is struggling , and you both love each other, find ways , work on it. There is nothing called as that they lived happily ever after.
IF someone among you have certain obligations and situations be fair with your spouse, elaborate every aspect and do not just make other person a broken heart. It will not benefit others, killing their hope and ruining their entire world …
I just say please invest  in your relations , then you get peace! Be nice and kind to everyone and there is not only you who struggles, the world is full!
So have courage , stand tall and keep your heart humble and surviving.
-          Love and Peace

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